Our Man in Havana

All the news that's fit to print, and some more besides…

First Minister's Golden Stool

When he goes on his regular retreat on his family estate in His West African constituency our dear leader is to be given a golden Stool to sit on.

Respect for Tradition

He is expected to be feted on arrival and treated as the supreme tribal chief in an historic ceremony with origins lost in the second dark age. Apparently the ritual used to be common place but is now relatively rare, confined to be a small group that try to keep up the traditions of the old Asante nation in West Africa.


13 Sep 2007 13:09

Eat Vacuum Red Eyed Freaks

Rumour has it that when the First Citizen heard about the Martian spies he was so annoyed that he suggested that they should all be rounded up and dropped off at New Mars, without benefit of space suits…

Martian Interference

Fortunately someone managed to persuade him that this might be just a tad inflammatory, although perhaps completely called for. In a private letter to the First Citizen it appears that Senator Hands confessed and apologised for the actions of his government, which he was personally involved in when in power. This apology was gracefully accepted.

No doubt there will be a gratuitous tit for tat expulsion of Earther diplomats. Don't book New Mars for your holiday…


7 Sep 2007 21:13

In a bit of a shock in the Senate the new First Minister has been chosen. Former First Space Lord and close supporter of the First Citizen, Senator Danso Tupac Ashanti, LoH has become our new esteemed leader.

Word on the Senate floor is that a number of party leaders and opinion formers across the entire Senate have been promised jobs and honours to support the new First Minister. Already the First Citizen's youngest brother has been named as the Foreign Minister.

More ministerial announcements are expected soon. Rumours are that Lee Zhang will remain in the government as the Finance Minister have been denied strongly by an official spokesman, it looks like all those who have supported the IAO in the past might be out of favour. Time will tell.


First Citizen to Address Senate?

~~DISCUSSION~~ Debate in the Senate as been fierce about the direction that the Government should take and who should form the next Administration. Senator Ozkok has ruled himself out as a permanent replacement for Lee Zhang saying that he had planned for some time to move on from Government at the next election. It is rumoured that he will be offered a senior post, possibly Chair, in the Interstellar Elections Commission.

Imperial Party Divided

Senator Lee Zhang's party remain divided on who should succeed him and this has provoked a general debate on other party candidates, as well as some independents, for First Minister. After nearly forty days of frantic behind the scenes activity it looks like the First Citizen is about to step in to end the deadlock. On being questioned about this the First Citizen's spokeswoman said 'The First Citizen is fully aware of the position and will play his constitutional role'. Rathbone has not addressed the Senate since the last State opening and the last time a First Citizen sat in the chamber outside such an event was in his Father's early days, some 45 years ago.

Front Runners

The state of play in the Senate has produced a short list of four potential candidates for First Minister.

Notable is the fact that all the front runners are ex-IEN or strongly supportive of the Navy lobby, bar Senator Bernard Malvolio who comes from a Corporate background.

The Power-Broker

The apparent peacebroker in all this appears to be Senator Danso Tupac Ashanti, LoH who has been in regular talks with all four as well as Senator Senator Hilmi Ozkok and, more significantly, Senator Rathbone, the First Citizen's younger son. Senator Ashanti is a former First Space Lord and an independent Senator. He is reported to be on good terms with the First Citizen having commanded the Imperial Guard.

9 Jul 2007 22:05

New Foreign Minister - Elvis Help Us All!!

Seb is the youngest son of the First Citizen's father (Charles L Rathbone) by his final lover. Many Imperial observers are believed to refer to Seb as the First Citizen's youngest brother in private.

Seb's Naval experience was entirely on interplanetary vessels, and he has never ventured outside of the Homeworlds.

Seb is a party-goer, gambler and womaniser, and his Imperial Guard PSD frequently have to clear up situations after him. Particularly embarassing was the alleged drunken assault on the Bishop of New Vegas during an illegal poker game in the crypt of the Bellagio Church eight years ago.

Seb's advisors are actually powerful bright slave units which frequently have to help him to correct mistakes via audio implants during live public comments.

Seb's so called powerful pronouncements include some bizarre speeches including calling for declarations of war on the RNV and the SSR over the last 5 years. These were subsequently audited out of the public record of Senate debates.


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